The Juggler by Ray Shay

The Juggler  

By Ray Shay 

 

Do you ever find yourself juggling?  There are so many different shapes, sizes and colors, that it is hard to keep track of all the balls.  I can close my eyes and see a rainbow of colors spinning and turning as each area of concern tumbles through the air.

As I sat in our Shay Realtors company car at 4S Ranch Community Park waiting for our youngest son Ryan to complete soccer practice, I thought I was doing pretty well on juggling the responsibilities of life, work and family.

Theresa and I have never missed Ryan's soccer games, but instead of attending his practices, I have been busy answering emails and making phone calls to friends, clients, and colleagues.  I was filling up precious minutes of time with this and that, this and that, and even more and more of this and that. 

In between juggling the balls in the air, I kept thinking about our children as I conducted my frequent checklist of their individual challenges and victories.  I wondered yet again why our youngest son Ryan, seemed to be loosing his interest in soccer.  

It would be such a waste because he was blessed with a magical touch on the ball. It must have been a gift from a higher source and I do not want it to be wasted.  

Perplexed, I set my IPad down on the seat next to me and looked up at the ceiling of my car as I tried to figure out why Ryan's soccer mojo was failing. That was when the thin grey ceiling material on the roof of my car heard me say, "Ray, you are such an idiot."

I realized I had dropped one of the most important, irreplaceable balls in my life.  It had hit the dark pavement and was rolling away from me.  Something I promised myself, I would never let happen. 

Here I was sitting in the parking lot of the sports park listening to National Public Radio working on real estate stuff, while our beautiful ten year old son is only about 100 yards away practicing soccer.  In years past, I was always a fixture at Ryan's older brothers, Raymond and Troy's, soccer practices. I made a point of sitting in my beach chair and chatting on the phone and occasionally answering an email.

Ray and Troy Shay

Those sunny afternoons always reinforced the reason I walked away from the SDPD and a career and friends that I dearly loved.  It was to raise these three young boys. I don't know if dumbass is one or two words, but that is what I felt like. I realized that maybe, Ryan is loosing interest in soccer because he thinks I am loosing interest in him and his favorite sport.

It made me think how much our focus changes from our first child to our third.  I still recall Theresa and I tip-toeing into our oldest son Troy's bedroom when he was only a few weeks old and videotaping him sleeping.  Really?  Videotaping a baby sleeping?   The oohs and ahhs were all his.

The photographs, videos, and extensive birthday celebrations peaked with our first and has been sliding slightly south since.  In the early years we got so busy giving our three boys baths, getting them fed, off to school, and over the years it seems life has just gotten busier.

As luck would have it, two days after my epiphany,  I made a point of attending Ryan's soccer practice.  For the first time in many years, my phone actually was out of power.  I watched his practice in peace and quiet.  It was the same field, where I had previously sat in the parking lot.

With my phone dead, watching him play soccer was amazing. I had a strange urge to drop my cell phone in the trash can next to the parking lot.  I don't think I am alone in those thoughts.  

I could see Ryan struggling against an opponent to gain control of the soccer ball, and pass it off to a teammate.  That is when I saw what any parent can easily recognize.  It is the childish glance or the double take when a child sees a mom or dad watching them. 

Of course, after practice Ryan said he did not need me to watch his practice. "it's not a big deal if you don't watch." It was a big deal to me.  As I tussled his sweaty hair atop his head, I made two commitments to myself.  The first was to hire the best Real Estate Operations Manager we could find to join Shay Realtors and better serve our clients wile taking some of this and that off our plates.  

The second promise was to Ryan and my family that no matter how large our business may grow or not, we will not get caught up with so much of the minutia that our trusted employees can easily handle.  Our children's smiles and being close to them are the most important things in our lives.

To ease my parental guilt, I apologized to Ryan and took him golfing. A sport that I am a true amateur. I explained that dads sometimes makes mistakes, but I will do my best not to be a repeat offender as the other balls can fall to the ground if needed, but I will do my utmost to make sure he, his mom and his brothers continue to remain flying high in the crystal blue air, where they belong.

Enjoy your week,

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