Friday, September 19, 2014

The Morning Waves by Ray Shay

The Morning Waves
By Ray Shay
7.29.14
 

Do you ever wonder if you are turning into one of your parents?  At 0615 hours, this past Saturday morning, at 18th Street beach in Del Mar, California, my father, Dick Shay probably looked down at me with a knowing smile.  He was looking at his son who is likely too old, too smart, or has come to the point in his life where he simply does not care what people think anymore. 

As the morning sun began to illuminate the pristine blue waves as they barreled into the beach our thirteen year old son, Raymond tossed his Go Pro waterproof digital recorder and neoprene black wetsuit hood on to the sand nearby where I was sitting  

Neoprene Hood and Go Pro  
Just before hitting the waves Raymond hollered out, "Dad can you take a video of me riding a wave with your I-phone?"  I nodded "yes" as I was too busy reading emails on my IPAD and reviewing some technical data on home sales.    

After a few minutes, I stopped and looked out at the Pacific Ocean and wondered to myself why I was working at this time in the morning, at one of the prettiest places on this planet. 

I think like most dads I struggle regularly trying to do a better job as a business owner, but more importantly as a father and a husband. 
 


Del Mar Lifeguards
Keeping Watch
After chatting with the lifeguards to the left and watching Raymond in the surf, I noticed his black neoprene hood and the Go Pro lying on the sand.  Like many dads and thirteen year old sons our relationship is not all peaches and cream.  I'm his dad and my job is not to always say, "yes." 

I think I have spent too many late hours with other people's children wearing handcuffs in the back seat of my patrol car, escorting them into County Jail or guarding a yellow crime scene taped perimeter, knowing a child's parents will be approaching any minute and I will be telling them what no parent ever wants to hear.

As a result I am probably tougher on our sons than I need to be, but it seems too many parents want to be their kid's BFF's, (best friends forever).  Unfortunately that parenting tactic sometimes ends in tragedy.  

Seeing Raymond once again in the surf, I decided to keep working to build the connection between us.  As I swam out, Raymond looked at me over his grey body board and I could clearly see his beautiful face and read his lips as he said, "Oh My G..." and turn his face away.   His big mistake was leaving both of those items on the beach

I agree it wasn't pretty.  To my sons horror, I probably looked like an old bank robber as I frolicked in the surf wearing grey shorts, no shirt and the black hood covering my head and face while carrying the Go Pro Digital Recorder with a pistol grip in my right hand. 


As our son and the other surfers and wave boarders caught some morning glass, I swam in the waves occasionally using my well tested two handed triangular grip to hold the camera steady as I videotaped Raymond body boarding prowess.  At one point he tried unsuccessfully to hide his face as we both started laughing uncontrollably at the absurdity of it all. 

At the end of the surf session I am not sure if I got any spectacular photographs or a decent video, but I will tell you that among the laughter, smiles and wearing that silly hood, I don't think my parents could have missed us.  The bits of laughter and good mojo between a dad and his son drifting up into the warming San Diego sky probably brought smiles to both of my parents long departed faces.    

I guess as scary as it is ... I really am turning into a blend of each of them.  Theresa and I both believe our children are our biggest treasures above anything else and as a parent you sometimes do unexpected or silly things to remind them of it.      



Have a great week, 





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